Wednesday, 23 November 2011

Made in Chelsea: Series two episode ten - Champagne, fireworks and, like, FIREWORKS

In the achingly glamorous world of Made in Chelsea, season two has come to a dramatic close - and we know it was dramatic because there were FIREWORKS. IN THE SKY.

All the cast, and some extras too but we don't care about them, all gathered outside the inevitable country house in which they were partying and drinking Champagne.

They were all thrilling at the fireworks, as the fall-out from the other fireworks - dramatic ones - continued to explode. Or do what dramatic fireworks do.
Millie from Made in Chelsea, waiting to drink some Champagne at a party.
 Note bottles of Champagne in foreground awaiting said drinkage (Pic: Ch4/Jules Heath)

So we had Millie - which tv-ooh maintains is primarily a name you'd give to a dog - sobbing into the arms of her best pal, the equally amusingly-named Caggie, who has a pout that looks like she's always moments away from bubble-blowing, even during times of emotional stress.

Mils was upset because she'd just found out from Cags that Millie's ex, Hugo, had had it away with Millie's friend Rosie during a trip to Monaco earlier in the series.

It was Monaco because that's a reminder of how jolly well jet-set and well-to-do everyone is. If this was The Only Way is Essex it would have happened in Magaluf. Or Weymouth.

But what makes this infidelity particularly bad is that Rosie had denied it to Millie recently, and also the fact that Millie and Hugo were on course to be reunited after other infidelity, because infidelity seems to be all the rage in Chelsea.

So Millie, in the middle of this 1920s-inspired, Great Gatsby-themed fancy dress party, took to the microphone and publicly 'thanked' Rosie for betraying her with Hugo, before swishing out of the room, all hurt and emotionally forlorn, like some proper soap actress in some proper climatic soap scene, only with better costumes.

So where are we at? Let us examine the facts!

Ra ra ra! Jamie from Made in Chelsea opening a bottle of Champagne
and enjoying the process enormously (Pic: Ch4/Jules Heath)
Season three and a 90 minute Christmas 'spesh' has been 'commished'

Argh, tv-ooh has that irritating habit of abbreviating words to sound all cool and 'moderns'. Shoot tv-ooh now.

But if that Christmas special doesn't have super-toff Mark Francis wearing a bright red sweater and organising some amazing party or other while drinking Champagne, tv-ooh will demand a notional refund.

And the commission for a series three shows that it isn't just tv-ooh watching the thing either, which is a relief.

It's all totes-amaze!

Yar, it like so is? But what's best about Chels is the regularity and amazingness of the parties they have, pretty much in EVERY EPISODE now. The parties are the results of schemes usually hatched by Amber and super-toff Mark Francis, who in fairness don't have very much else to do in the show now that their 'entreprenuerial business projects' storyline failed to be of any interest whatsoever.

So what we've come to expect is that in part one of the episode, they have the idea, possibly while drinking Champagne, and then in part four, barely 20 minutes later, it's all been amazingly organised, with staff, fancy dress and every last cast member free to attend, and the whole thing goes without a hitch.

If the pair of them are that good at organising stuff they should pop down to number 10 Downing Street, see if they can't sort out this here economic gloom - Mark Francis would insist on Champagne but Cameron would have some Cava in the fridge upstairs so it's fine.

But having said that, in Made in Chelsea there is no economic gloom so there'd be no problem to solve in the first place. Result!

Louise and Spencer not drinking Champagne but some sort of cocktail -
a mojito perhaps - during a roulette game. The drama! (Pic: Ch4/Jules Heath)

Big parties as gigantic ruse

But in reality those events and parties are probably just the result of the producers realising what their plot function is: they are in fact a gigantic ruse to bring the cast together in the same scenes to create fireworks - dramatic ones, remember (see above) - so the characters can have some awkward interplay and look at each other blankly for a while.

And so it came to pass. At this party, Cheska confronted the barking-mad Gabriella, Jamie cleared the air with the barking-mad Gabriella about their 'drunken fun' (tv-ooh feels queasy), while the will they/won't they storyline between Spencer and Caggie limped onwards since its mid-series resurrection. FOR GOD'S SAKE CAN SOMEONE KNOCK THEIR HEADS TOGETHER PLEASE CHEERS.

Chelsea vs Essex

If tv-ooh had to choose, tv-ooh would go for Made in Chelsea over The Only Way is Essex.

Chelsea's deliberate colour palette of whites, creams and beige dominate the screen - there's no bright Essex reds or neon blues here - so the whole thing often looks and feels a bit more filmic - a bizarre statement perhaps but you can't argue with those seductive shots of London landmarks. Try it - they'd just look back at you blankly as London landmarks can't speak.

Made in Chelsea looks great on-screen, although scenes of Mils and Cags having their toenails done are admittedly not quite as thrilling (insert joke about watching paint dry here, ho ho).

Also, the character interplay and (ahem) 'storylining' is perhaps stronger in Chels, and the comedy has been beefed up this series: deliberately with Mark Francis, Ollie and Francis, and by accident with the arrival of Jamie, the amazingly named Gabalicious (not to be confused with the barking-mad Gabriella) and Binks and Cheska, now that they've made up again.

Of course, none of that stops it being total nonsense - but tv-ooh's a bit partial to some nonsense now and again.

Perhaps you've noticed.

Champagne?

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