Wednesday, 16 May 2012

Made in Chelsea Series 3 episode 7: And on the seventh day God created Francis

You'll recall, won't you, how tv-ooh supposed last time that Made in Chelsea had suddenly become a bleak and damning essay on the intricacies of modern romance and the barren self-destructive hopelessness therein.

So now, our fears that the programme is perhaps approaching near biblical proportions in terms of the size - we're talking width, length AND height here viewers - of its increasingly grim and complicated depiction of those two main pillars of so-called 'structured reality', friendships and love, has now been further acknowledged.

And we're quite loving it, as it goes.

Witness episode 7 and see how it's all been ratcheted up a notch - and further more, Francis is suddenly referencing Jesus.


He turns up at Jamie's house with 24 cans of beer in an effort to help him through his difficult time, given that Louise and his best friend Spencer had hooked up while in Dubai.

"When I'm trying to deal with betrayal I think about what Jesus would do," says Francis.

Only Francis could get away with that.

He continues: "Jesus was like a superhero. He got shit done."

"Okay," says Jamie.

"Judas betrayed Jesus. What did Jesus do?"

"Forgive him."

"What should you do?"

"Forgive Spencer?"

"And Louise? You don't want to forgive Louise? I don't think Jesus would only forgive Spencer."

You'd never get that in The Only Way is Essex.

Amazing.

Other key points like this all matters somehow

Louise being a drip

She's run into the arms of Spencer because Jamie doesn't want her -  but Spencer will tire of her soon.

She cried when Jamie upset her, and she didn't defend her friend Millie when Cheska, Rosie and Victoria turned up unannounced at the 'cheer up Louise spa weekend' that Millie had organised.

The result was the most awkward scene ever to be played out while everyone involved was dressed in white towelling housecoats. There needs to be a new BAFTA category for that.

And even though Millie then got the chance for a good 'flouncing out of a building into a car while wearing a hat' scene, she didn't get much support.

Kimberley not being who she says she is

After Richard's over-the-top helicopter date that won over flicky-haired sex kitten Kimberley, Binky tells Cheska what she's heard about Kimberley.

Kimberley has only just split up from a long term boyfriend and so is not all she seems - and has apparently been intent on finding a replacement boyfriend since her arrival in Chelsea. And Richard - rich, wealthy Richard - appears to fit the bill nicely.

There's a glimpse here of how these 'structured reality' programmes could become quite dark - a 'character with a past' is a soap staple, but giving a new character, such as Kimberley, a whole 'back story' that's at odds with how she's coming across now, feels like something new here. Therefore it can only be a matter time before Fredrik's secret double life as a gang leader is revealed. Maybe.

Outdoor leisure time with Jamie and Binks

Last time it was badminton (or similar), this week, it's croquet, despite Binks' 'lack of hand to eye co-ordination'.

But she uses some down-time to persuade Jamie to meet up with Spencer so they can talk about it their 'issues' and also provide us with a nice scene.

'Good boy,' says Binks, on behalf of the audience.

Next week

Cheska brings in Kimberley's ex, and Kimberley's face drops; while Spencer is seen flirting with Natalie's sister, Karine, minutes after he agreed to be Louise's boyfriend.

If you were in any doubt, we WILL be watching.

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