Monday, 7 January 2013

EastEnders: Why are Tanya and Kirsty fighting over Max anyway?

While it's unlikely that Tanya in EastEnders was referring to a Paul Daniel's Magic Set when she said Kirsty knew 'a few tricks in the bedroom', she knows Tanya's a threat, and so the pair are squaring up for a bitch fight over the same man - but is Max worth the bother? 

We all know how it is around the Square, so it shouldn't have been a surprise when Max Branning's secret wife Kirsty turned up on his wedding day to his former wife and mother of his children, Tanya.

Her perfectly timed arrival - dramatically speaking, of course - not only prompted a fatal heart attack in Max's brother Derek, who had paid Kirsty to stay out of Max's life (obviously - he was a bad 'un), but Kirsty and Tanya ended up fighting over who gets Max, like he's some sort of prize in a raffle. And not a very good prize at that - more your day out at Madame Tussaud's rather than a cruise around the Caribbean, say.

Tanya and Max on their second wedding day, before it all went wrong obviously.
And that background's probably not real. IS NOTHING AS IT SEEMS?!
So the two women are now poised for battle in what will probably be a long runner of a storyline, or at least see one (Tanya) leave the Square for a bit.

Tanya, in the red corner, has fought cancer, had another failed marriage to someone else we've forgotten (he was called Greg), raised Max's two daughters and put up with his previous dodgy dealings and what we'll gently describe as his 'roving eye' (ie he had an affair with his son's girlfriend, among others).

And in the blue corner we have Kirsty, who Max apparently married while apart from Tanya in the summer of 2011. It must have been a whirlwind engagement, but let's not worry about that now.

But if Kirsty loved him so much, how did Derek manage to pay her enough to keep her away?

He takes her to all the best places: Kirsty and Max in an alleyway on the Square

Kierston Wareing's a great actress (as is Jo Joyner of course) but so far Kirsty appears to be another one of those 'hard faced' 'anything for my man' characters: strong and tough but prone to poor judgements when it comes to men folk. And y'know, 'a bit tarty'.

Let's hope she reveals more dimensions than just this one.

And we're told - apparently - that women love a bad boy, but how bad is good? Even Tanya admitted that he's 'a liar and a cheat'. Irresistible, clearly.

Perhaps a more likely explanation is that this - that is, Max - has become a point of pride: both Tanya and Kirsty feel they are entitled to have Max, and don't want to lose face.

And in a way, he's almost irrelevant because no-one - NO ONE - is going to get in Tanya and Kirsty's way.

Erm, apart from the other one, that is - which in turn means there will be a few more scenes like the one below.

Maybe these are strong, determined women after all. But just with slightly dodgy tastes in men.

Maybe a Paul Daniel's Magic Set might have been a more sensible choice after all.

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